Feature: Five Frightfully Bad PlayStation 3 Games
Posted by Sammy Barker
Scarier than Silent Hill
We could have pricked our fingertip and penned a feature about some of the greatest horror games in this space, but there are genuinely more terrifying titles on the PlayStation 3 than Dead Space, Resident Evil 5, and F.E.A.R. 2: Project Origin. Unfortunately for the releases included below, though, it wasn’t necessarily their intention to be spooky – but that doesn't mean that you shouldn't run a mile if you see them in a store. So, without further ado, let’s celebrate Hallowe’en in a different way, and tip a glass of pumpkin juice to five of the more frightfully bad experiences on PS3.
We’re not entirely sure what possessed Codemasters to publish now defunct developer Blue Omega Entertainment’s atrocious space cowboy shoot-‘em-up Damnation, but we’re convinced that it had a hand in the company’s later decision to focus on racing games. A former Make Something Unreal runner-up, there was an amateur allure to the third-person action title back in 2005. However, by the time that it was deployed as a retail product in mid-2009, the otherworldly excursion had been utterly usurped by the likes of Uncharted: Drake’s Fortune. Boasting sub-par platforming, horrendous gunplay, and even worse graphics, this is one abomination that should be thankful that it’s been forgotten with the passing of time.
Licensed games are typically bad at the best of times, but Fast & Furious: Showdown offered a special kind of car crash. Based on a franchise that already rests on shaky suspension, the last-second announcement of the Activision published spin-off promised Pursuit Force-esque on-wheels antics and more vehicular thrills than your local destruction derby. Instead, developer Firebrand Games – which seems to get all of the duff jobs – served up a steaming wreck of a release, riddled with bugs, sloppy physics, and disastrous presentation. This shambling write-off's one redeeming feature is that it can be finished in less than two hours.
When you cast your mind back to 2010, you have to question whether Sony truly took the PlayStation Move seriously. It was hot news at the time, but the platform holder really didn’t put its best foot forward with its illuminating wand’s initial software roster. While bundled release Sports Champions was a soulless treat, Kung Fu Rider remains the biggest embarrassment with a Sony Computer Entertainment logo on its box. Clearly designed with the DualShock 3 in mind, the platform holder hastily added atrocious gesture controls to the daft downhill excursion in order to bolster its phallic stick’s launch lineup. To make matters worse, it attached a retail price point to the unplayable adventure – even though it had all of the hallmarks of a cheap-and-cheerful digital download.
The culmination of an outrageously off-kilter development cycle – in which the game was cancelled multiple times – it’s incredible that Ride to Hell: Retribution even saddled up at retail at all. Originally announced in 2008 by British-based video game port-house Eutechnyx, the 2013 title depicts the antics of Vietnam veteran Jake Conway, and explores the gang-related biker movement of 1969. It would be a solid premise if the release wasn’t an utterly atrocious beat-‘em-up with borderline broken gameplay and some of the most repulsive characters in interactive entertainment history. This one is so bad that neither its developer nor publisher is willing to even acknowledge its existence.
Bethesda hasn’t always poured its cash into promising properties like Dishonored and The Evil Within. Back when it first got into the publishing game, it recruited Blacklight Retribution developer Zombie Studios to work on a tactical shooter called Rogue Warrior: Black Razor. The studio was pulled off the production in 2007 after the Elder Scrolls creator cited a dislike for the title’s direction, and Rebellion Derby was employed in its place to reboot the release. Fronted by Hollywood star Mickey Rourke, the brief action game ended up being utterly forgettable, despite the first-person excursion’s sizeable budget. Its lasting legacy will forever remain the expletives-laden funk song that inexplicably scored the outing’s credits sequence. What were they thinking?
Are you aware of a more frightfully bad game on the PS3 than this little lot? Have you actually played any of the abovementioned titles? Shake your head disbelievingly in the comments section below.
Which of the following do you think is the worst game on PS3? (22 votes)
Fast & Furious: Showdown
Kung Fu Rider
Ride to Hell: Damnation
Please login to vote in this poll.