Topic: Mental Health Awareness/ Support Chat

While this thread got a bump, what do all of you do when you're stressed? Might be stress from work, might be private stuff. What do you do when thinks get a bit much?

I'm very easily stressed, and am not able to handle a lot of stress easily. So for example last week I had my yearly review at my work and a lot of other work to do, and I was feeling a bit uneasy all week. It's all good again now, but maybe some tips?

I destress by taking long walks, doing breathing exercises and yoga.

Hahahahahaah I jest. I panic eat and wait until bed time. Obviously.

@TabulaRasa That sounds difficult .Good luck out there.

With regards to outlets, I always try to have a few "small, healthy obsessions". It's always something like "I don't know anything about Elvis Presley, I'm going to make it a point to listen to all his music this week." Just stuff to get lost in.

There's always this kind of balance where addictions aren't good, but having something to obsess about for a little while can help me switch tracks.

Also, your situation sounds very serious. You have people to help you?

My mental health has been kinda all over the place since the pandemic started. When I first started working from home it was an absolute dream. And I would still rather work from home than waste hours of my life commuting like I used to before. But you kinda don’t realise how meaningful those micro interactions are with colleagues, even if you don’t particularly like them. I live on my own and just the overwhelming loneliness I feel at times, it is like it is going to bury me. Plus my life is just so meaningless now. It wasn’t any more varied and meaningful in an office, but it at least gave you an excuse to get up, get dressed, go and talk to people and do things. Giving the illusion of progression to some degree. Working from home has turned me into a ghost who haunts my apartment and just… exists in this static state. It is weird, because 99% of the time I am fine, but then I will just go into these depressed slumps that can sometimes last weeks at a time, but once I get out of the other side of them I’ll be fine then for months afterwards even though nothing changes.

This is a good question. Living in this day and age brings it’s fair share of stress. I’m no expert, but I feel like we humans have created a world in which we aren’t yet properly adapted to handle, at least not instinctively. The kinds of mental stress we put ourselves through day-in and day-out is different from what our ancestors had to deal, especially primordial humans. In many ways we aren’t naturally wired for survival in a modern world. People through the ages have struggled with mortal survival and the basic physical needs of life, which is it’s own form of stress, but nowadays we struggle with different issues. Whereas prehistoric man or woman might benefit from having ADHD and hyper-reactive anxiousness in order to deal with predators, enemies, and the need for robust fight or flight responses, we have it different. In the current era, we don’t have regular attacks on our physical survival and so the body’s response to mental, social, and emotional stress creates survival instincts that don’t work well in our world, especially when such “attacks” are a constant barrage during every waking hour at work and home via technology.

Although humankind has remarkable resilience and adaptability, our intellectual cleverness has changed our world quicker than our bodies have been able to evolve to it. Within the last generation we’ve turned life into a constant onslaught of hyper-stimulation and overabundance. Throughout history and up until 1900 the majority of people participated in some form of farming or hunting for their sustenance. Merely 100 years later, the only farming I do is in my RPG’s and the only hunting I do is on Amazon. If a restaurant doesn’t Door-Dash its a major inconvenience. Evolutionarily I feel like this shift in social and existential tone has led to much of the mental health crisis in the world. We inundate our bodies with adrenaline when it really doesn’t ‘need’ it for survival purposes. Yet the physical effects of the hormonal response still manifest themselves.

Furthermore, increased global communication has also led to excessive pursuit of social climbing, financial success, and hyper-comparison and self-judgement. One salient phenomenon that I’ve observed is that there is no direct relation of affluence or social achievement with happiness and contentment. In fact, i think there’s an inverse relationship between how much money you have and how content you are. Its a well-worn fable visited many times in stories, but I think it’s true — the simple life is often a happier life. Nevertheless I recognize I can’t speak with authority on the subject and there’s plenty of misery in poverty. So perhaps it’s more of a bell-shaped curve rather than a direct inverse relationship of wealth and life-satisfaction. Either way, it’s something to think about.

One thing to be clear — depression, anxiety, and all their associated psychological cousins are legitimate biological health issues and do need professional intervention. I am a firm believer that people should seek out mental health care when they have clinical depression and disabling anxiety. No question about it. Whether it be proper medication, professional counseling, or a combination of the two, I encourage those individuals who are susceptible to get the help they need.

So with that said and the preceding background lecture on human history, I think there’s a few ways one might deal with routine ‘garden-variety’ stress (ie. not the aforementioned clinical disorder variety). I try to take the personal approach of finding outlets for my daily stress. Video gaming is actually one of them. Exercise would be another (which I’m doing very poorly at right now). When stress is high I also like to meditate and disconnect from the noise of the world. And I think there is substantial value in having some kind of grounded place to reset my own expectations. Most of the time I stress about things that either A) I have no control over, or B) that are quite insignificant in the grand scheme of things. Sometimes it takes an outside observer, like a family member or friend, to point out the futility of stressing over something. I do try to remember my ancestors scraping by and starving due to an ill-timed drought, or suffering from physical maladies that are easily treated nowadays, and it helps reset my frustrations when the WiFi doesn’t work or someone cuts me off in traffic.

@Th3solution I never replied to this message. I sometimes do that. It doesn't mean I don't value posts like these. Quite the opposite maybe. I probably have not replied to some of this community's best posts.

So, here's to you. Thanks for this post. I had some stress at work today, and it was nice coming back to your post, and reading that insight!

Just dropping by to mention that while obviously some mental health conditions require therapy + meds, in my experience, exercise and meditation will do wonders on their own to improve one's mental health. You should be doing those regardless of whether you're receiving professional help tbh.

Holy psychological evaluation 101 @Th3solution that comment blew me away. Amazing.

I've been in a weird place recently. I've had a few of my team in work leave of their own volition, in quick succession. All whilst another colleague had weeks worth of holiday. Bad timing. Meaning I'm working way over normal with added stress and recruitment.

On returning from holiday end of July, we had the chance for some bargain home improvements and decorating. We signed up, knowingly putting ourselves in a bit of debt. To the sum of about £2000 after using our reserves. That was okay, pay it off over 2-3 months, until our boiler died last week. 😢

My mums care home is on the cusp of closing after the council funded clients were all moved out (council orders). We've had a couple of meetings, meaning my mum needs to look for a new place to live come Christmas.

Super stress, anxiety and I'm so tired.

But strangely I'm in a zen mood now. I've had a couple of tantrums and an argument with the wife. But once January comes, the house will be up to date. My mum will be safe. My team will be refreshed and I will finally be able to complete Diablo 2 remastered. Let's go!

@themcnoisy Lol, stay tuned for the next in my ongoing lecture series. 🤓

But seriously, I went back and read that and I was clearly in a mood that day. 😅 Regardless, glad that it held your interest and I really hope things turn back around for you. Glad to see you’ve maintained your trademark good attitude in the face of it all. Sometimes bad luck seems to come in bunches, but inevitably things will turn around, like you say.

Honestly, I’ve had a rough week too with some similar family issues, unforeseen large expenses, and also a run of badly-timed health issues. What’s helped me lately is some emotional support from family. I’m thankful to have access to that, which I know many people don’t. Anyways hang in there, my friend. As they say, You can’t keep a good man (or woman) down!

@Kidfried It’s kind of you to come back and comment and especially nice of you to have read my ramblings. I can relate that sometimes when I’m busy I might neglect commenting on even really helpful or interesting posts on here but indeed they are much appreciated! Even some of the small and simple thoughts can make me pause, ponder, and rethink things from time to time. Or occasionally someone’s post says something that just puts a smile on my face or makes me laugh out loud. And on a tough day, often that’s what I really need.

@The3solution Oh thats nice to hear that you can fell that you can get help from ohter peoples comments

I've been having naff all motivation lately. I'm not sure what it is but for the past couple weeks or so I've not really wanted to do anything. I don't feel down or depressed or anything so I'm not entirely sure what has me feeling this way — maybe I'm just in denial. 😂

But, yeah, I don't know. I've been considering my options looking for a new job (I still have one currently) but not really having success because I don't have a degree or anything and I feel job openings are so few and far between - in my area, at least - so maybe that's where the lack of motivation is coming from? I've no idea.

Anyway, that's my rant if you wanna call it that.

@Th3solution you are amazing bro. 👏

We should start a podcast but then again, we won't have the time to run it properly rofl 🤣 too many bills. It's great you have a close family. They can be annoying at times with failing easy tasks like subtraction, stubbornly refusing to get changed and putting my PlayStation controller in the tumble dryer. I'm sure there are positives too.

@KAIRU Move bro! Best decision I ever made was uprooting admittedly to the Navy. But it opens your eyes and you have new experiences. Your a top head mate. Hang on, that's Sol, Kyle, Noisy. I'm thinking Knight Station Natter for the podcast. Whaddaya think?

@Ralizah Excercize is THE key. Right on. I let myself go last year, in a big way. A bit too big. It was great scoffing cakes at midnight, not so great running out of breath literally getting off the couch.

Bought a crosstrainer and I love the thing.

So yeah we got Rali too. That's the Really Kinky Stallion Nonesense. Yeah I will think of something better for the podcast.

@themcnoisy Ah, mate. If I could relocate right now I’d do it in a heartbeat.

Hope you’ve been keeping well. Miss the Rocket League bants!

@KAIRU not missing RL though, that place is a cess pitt. The negativity over there, is not good for anyone's mental health.

Funnily my colleague has just relocated from Liverpool back to Ireland (Admitedly Southern Ireland - Sligo so its not that coincidental) he's had a good 8 years and has headed back with a heavy heart and loads of memories. I will miss him.

Anyhow what are you playing ATM? I'm currently running Diablo 2 remastered. Last night I beat the 3rd Area boss (mephisto). It took my about 2 hours with my Babarian whos about as lucky as a one legged man in an arse kicking contest. I beat the boss, warped back to base to move on. I have literally just found out I was meant to use a warp gate straight after the boss, else I have to do it again! Nooooo.

@themcnoisy Aye, I've heard Rocket League is just mental nowadays. It was great fun back when we were playing it but the skill levels of players now is just insane. Definitely way above my level.

I'm playing Baldur's Gate 3 at the minute. My character is a sneaky wee Rogue with nimble fingers who likes to pick a pocket or two. Been having a blast just exploring and trying to get better at the turn-based combat. It's been good fun so far!

When I'm feeling stressed, I find it helpful to take a step back and disconnect from the source of stress for a bit. Whether it's work-related pressure or personal issues, a short break often does wonders.
For me, nature is a great stress-reliever. A walk in the nearby park or just sitting outside, breathing in fresh air, can be incredibly calming. And I'm a music enthusiast, so I often put on my favorite playlist to unwind.
I've recently discovered HHC Gummies as a way to manage stress and anxiety. They provide a sense of relaxation without the "high" associated with THC. It's been a game-changer for me in handling stress.