First-Time Fantasy: "Twiggy" Plays Final Fantasy VII For The First-Time.

Twiggy’s playing through Final Fantasy VII for the first-time ever. Join him as he catalogues his progress but beware, if you’re still planning on playing through Final Fantasy VII for yourself, there are spoilers ahead.

“Mouth to mouth!?” I exclaim. “She’s just a girl.” Ahh, Final Fantasy VII’s repressed innuendo returns. I’d wondered where it had gone. You see, myself and my chosen army of three (Tifa of course, and Barrett) just saved the young Priscilla from a giant serpent named erm, Bottomswell. No, not the most menacing of names but you should have seen him. He was huge!

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First-Time Fantasy: "Twiggy" Plays Final Fantasy VII For The First-Time.

Twiggy’s playing through Final Fantasy VII for the first-time ever. Join him as he catalogues his progress but beware, if you’re still planning on playing through Final Fantasy VII for yourself, there are spoilers ahead.

If I didn’t know any better at this stage, I’d say Sephiroth likes reading books. He’s in the basement of the Shinra’s mansion, frantically flipping through the pages of hardback after hardback. He’s searching for the truth. The truth about his mother. The truth about his life. He seems distant. I approach him, ask him what’s what, but he sends me away. He’s different.

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First-Time Fantasy: "Twiggy" Plays Final Fantasy VII For The First-Time.

Twiggy’s playing through Final Fantasy VII for the first-time ever. Join him as he catalogues his progress but beware, if you’re still planning on playing through Final Fantasy VII for yourself, there are spoilers ahead.

Final Fantasy VII just became road-rash. I’m riding on the back of a huge motorcycle, wielding my elongated sword. I’ve got to protect Barrett and the others. They’re in a truck just ahead. We’ve escaped from the Shinra building, Aeris in tow. Rescued her. Saved her. But dude, has the whole story turned on its head.

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You So Ain't Getting That Final Fantasy VII Remake Anytime Soon.

In a double-sweep of disappointment for Final Fantasy fans, Square Enix’s production duo Yoshinori Kitase and Motomu Toriyama have poo-pooed the HD remake of Final Fantasy VII, declaring traditional RPG towns (as seen in Square’s classic) are “too hard” to do in HD. “Considering the amount of work to make graphics that deserve HD, it is hard to make towns in the conventional style,” said Toriyama.

Final Fantasy VII used pre-rendered graphics when it launched in the mid-late 1990’s, and layered polygonal characters on-top. Square Enix’s point of view is that the amount of art-work required to recreate those towns in HD would be extremely difficult.

Kitase agreed, stating “it is very hard to make games on PlayStation 3 in the same style the games in that era had. Making graphics will take enormous time.”

Apparently, this is also the reason you won’t be seeing any towns in Final Fantasy XIII. Nothing to do with the XBOX 360’s disc limitations? Hmm.

Time to let go Final Fantasy fans?

First-Time Fantasy: "Twiggy" Plays Final Fantasy VII For The First-Time.

Twiggy’s playing through Final Fantasy VII for the first-time ever. Join him as he catalogues his progress but beware, if you’re still planning on playing through Final Fantasy VII for yourself, there are spoilers ahead.

If the blaring “battle music” is anything to go by, I’d say we’re in a panic. The Don’s told us that Sector 7 is to be blown to the ground and apparently Barrett’s up the tower trying to fight. Myself and Tifa leg it, leaving Aeris to look after Barrett’s daughter Marlene. Shit Marlene. What if we don’t make it in time?

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First-Time Fantasy: "Twiggy" Plays Final Fantasy VII For The First-Time.

Twiggy’s playing through Final Fantasy VII for the first-time ever. Join him as he catalogues his progress but beware, if you’re still planning on playing through Final Fantasy VII for yourself, there are spoilers ahead.

I’m starting to realise why everyone loves Final Fantasy VII so. When I left you last time, I’d been hanging with the lovely Tifa. Shortly after that, we headed straight back to another generator thing. We needed to blow it. Turns out it all went a bit wrong. After a short encounter with the Shinra president (and a boss-fight), I found myself clutching a ledge. That dick-head Barrett wouldn’t save me, so I fell. And found myself in the arms of the “Flower Girl”.

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Even The Cover Art Is Amazing.

Twiggy’s in agreement – Team Teamwork’s Final Fantasy VII/hip-hop mash-up is phenomenal. Aside from a brief appearance of the frighteningly folk Tom Waits, this “pay-what-you-want” record is the perfect compliment to our First-Time Fantasy series.

Go download it from here.